Tomorrow

If I died tomorrow, who would know?
Who would care?
Who would rescue me if I called for them?
Who would hear me?
Who would try to stop me from leaving this world if they knew beforehand?
Who would come to my funeral and cry and say "If only...."?
Who would be strong enough or courageous enough to show me these "If only's" before I die? Who would come and show me a better life?
Who would show me the love I have always wanted?
Who would come and take me away from here?
Who will come and save me from tomorrow?
If I died tomorrow, who would know?

Come to me

Come to me tonight.
Come to me in the light of the moon, silent and confident.
Come to me through my window, the door to my world.
Come to me as a lover, a bringer of peace.
Come to me in the dark and touch my body, my mind, my heart.
Come to me and touch me like a shadow, icy, soft and beautiful.
Come to me as my rescuer, my hero, my protector from the world.
Come to me and whisper hope into my ear.
Come to me and bring me back from the dead.
Come to me and show me love worth fighting for, worth killing for, worth dying for.
Come to me and show me sacrifice.
Come to me and show me your true self, and reveal to me mine.
Come to me and be my life forever.

One more step

I must not give in
I must keep going
One more step

I must not give up
I must keep going
One more step

I must survive this life
I must keep going
One more step

I must look for the sun
I must keep going
One more step

I must make it through this nightmare
I must keep going
One more step

I must live this pain
I must keep going
One more step

I must know this isolation
I must keep going
One more step

I must carry on
I must keep going
One more step

I must remember this fight
I must keep going
One more step

You

In the day I think of you
In the night I dream of you
In the silence I hear you
In the pain I feel you
In the blood I taste you
In the heart I am you

Anger

Anger
Ripping through my heart
Shredding my self control
Killing my love
Wounding my hope
Tearing up my sanity
Driving away my calm
Taking away my progress
Sinking my dreams
Becoming my everything
Taking the place of all I hold dear
The only thing that is constant and close
Anger

Ashamed

I asked myself today why I am ashamed of myself. When did I start to think of myself as not being good enough or not up to par? I look around me and I see so many who will not meet my eyes because they feel ashamed of themselves like I do. Why is this? Why do we feel this way? I do not want be ashamed of who I am and what I want or what I feel and think and believe. This is me, when did that become something bad? When did it become such a bad thing to be me? Just because someone does not like who I am or the things that I choose or the style of clothes that I wear, that does not make me lower than anyone else. It does not make me a bad person. I am not beneath anyone. I am not inferior. I am me, and that is okay. I AM dark and I am weird and I am strange and unusual and eccentric, and that is okay. You can call me whatever you like, I do not care anymore. I will not be ashamed to be myself. I will not cower away in the corner because I do not fit in. I will embrace every weirdness, every peculiarity about myself. I will shout it from the roof tops " I am me and I am okay with that". This is who I really am , if people do not like that then they can cross the street, or look the other way, but no longer will I punish myself for being different. I am not ashamed. I am me and that is beautiful.

Sweet Dreams

We lie here together, side by side, staring at each other between the flashes of our lives. Our hearts blood running from our veins and joining together on the bathroom floor. Just as our blood becomes one here so our souls will be one on the other side. We are the last thing each other sees before the dim and dark take our sight from us. Together we sleep, together we die and together we fly to a place where there is no pain, no hurt, sadness, anger, or sorrow. A place where there is no you, there is no me, there is only us. A place where forever actually exists, hearts are whole, love is complete and anything is possible. Peace is everywhere. We are one and the same, we can never be parted. So we will take these razors and commit ourselves to each other for always and forever. We will sleep here together and wake in that beautiful place. Sweet dreams my love, sweet dreams.